Hate You, Love You
Hate You Love You

"Do whatever makes you happy. I'll accept and appreciate all your decisions,"

"What ?" Amara muttered softly. I can't believe what he just heard. Suddenly his chest thumped hard to find that Gio had known everything.

"Sorry," Gio said with his face showing regret. "I'm sorry for accidentally listening to your conversation with him. I didn't mean to eavesdrop. Believe that... I heard it because the door to your room was open" explained Gio.

Amara did not respond, she just stood with her mouth tightly gritted and eyes straight at Gio. Both of his hands tightly held his drinking bottle as if to hold on.

"Thank God you can stay together" Gio said again without being able to hide his sad-looking face. "Please tell him that I'm really sorry for everything that's happened. About Evan... He'll stay with me. You must know that I love her very much. But if someday you want to meet her, I'll never get in the way. Me and Evan will love you. Be happy...,"

Deg !!

Amara's eyes were suddenly wet and her heart felt like it was squeezed when she heard the words of love spewing from Gio's mouth. "A-what do you mean?" Ask Amara timidly.

But...

Amara could not get an answer from her husband. Because Gio immediately turned his body to leave, shortly after he said the word "happy.." to Amara.

It was not without reason that Gio left Amara. His heart was no longer able to say goodbye. Gio desperately refrained from running at Amara and hugged her tightly.

As much as Gio's energy against his desire to bring Amara in his arms and kiss him full of demands. Gio did not want to hurt the woman he loved so much.

Gio sat his body in the darkness of the night. His breath was hunting, because his chest felt tight. This was the biggest heartbreak of his life.

As for Amara, she returned to her room. The clear water still went down to wet both cheeks when Amara had rubbed it repeatedly. There was a strange rumble in his heart as Gio said his farewell words.

Shouldn't Amara be happy because Gio would take it off so easily ? Even the man was willing to be heartened by still allowing Amara to meet Evan. But why Amara felt otherwise. I don't know why Amara felt sad, disappointed and also in disbelief when Gio let himself go.

"You should be thankful that Gio doesn't make things difficult" Amara told herself.

"Now stay focused on learning and then prepare to go to meet Danis," said Amara again. Even though he realized what came out of his lips did not match what he felt in his heart.

***

Even in the morning greeting, the sun began to show itself from the dispute. Two humans both witnessed it all because they could not close their eyes to sleep even if only for a moment.

He was Gio and Amara who stayed up all night because of their conversation. Both experienced a great inner struggle against their own feelings.

Amara feels hate for Gio for making her feelings become chaotic. While Gio, so tormented because he could not express his true feelings to Amara. Gio did not want to stop Amara from achieving his happiness. Gio really hated the situation he had to face.

'plek'

The eyes of Amara and Gio clashed as the two of them walked out of their room in parallel. There was an invisible feeling that was raging inside the chest of the two. Everything seemed to change because of last night's conversation.

Gio already looks neat, so does Amara. The two of them were getting ready early in the morning to avoid each other's awkward encounters like this. But in fact God willed another by bringing them together.

"Is there morning lecture ?" Ask Gio. He tried so hard to be mediocre as if nothing happened.

"Hu'um," replied Amara with a nod of her head. Her heartbeats were crazy just for being asked like that.

"Eat first before leaving," Gio invited and inevitably Amara also obeyed him.

There's only them at the dinner table. Sit facing each other in silence. Everything feels awkward and unpleasant. Only the sound of the fork clanking against the plate was heard.

Unfortunately, even Evan had not woken up so there was no reason for them to share their attention with Evan.

"Let's drop off" said Gio. Although he knew the whole journey would be excruciating but he could not bear to let Amara go alone.

"Don't it bother you ? You seem to be busy,"

"Not at all. Let me take you,"

***

Gio focused on the streets, his mouth tightly clenched with a straight forward look. Without Amara knowing, Gio is at war with his own head.

Gio hated love at the same time. Hate himself for loving Amara so much but not being able to say it.

Hate because his desire is increasingly passionate to attract Amara in his arms. Hate Amara who does not understand her deep love.

Likewise Amara who without Gio knows is feeling the inner struggle in his heart. He hates Gio who now makes his feelings become chaotic. Hate being caught up in his own thoughts about Gio saying the word love last night.

Amara wanted to ask about it. But he was afraid of just hearing wrong, because after that Gio did not say anything more. The man left her alone. Trapped in feelings that Amara could not describe. He really hated Gio's love last night.

"Mmh... How long do you have to go to college ?" Gio asked, breaking the silence between them.

"I'm sure you'll be able to finish it quickly. I'll ask the college to provide convenience,"

Amara grunted in annoyance. "You don't have to ask the campus !! I will work hard to finish quickly" said Amara. I don't know why Amara does not like the words of Gio who seems to want him to leave immediately.

Gio smiled faintly, the broken heart back he felt. "Of course you will work hard, because you can't wait to meet him !" sahut Gio was quiet but Amara could still hear him.

"Let me down in front only !" Tell Amara when she sees a bus stop in front of her.

"Why ?" Gio asked as he furrowed his brows not understanding.

Amara fell silent, she could not tell Gio the truth. He doesn't like the subject of their speakers. "Because you're a bitch !!" Amara answered while turning her head to the side because suddenly her eyes blurred.

Gio looked at Amara with a smile, "sorry" Gio said sincerely. "I'm sorry if I misspoke" Gio continued. He felt hate for himself for making his lover become moping. After that silence between the two until Amara arrived at his campus.

***

'tok tok' came a knock on the door, making Gio lift his face and look towards the door of his room that was not closed perfectly.

There stood a woman whom Gio loved very much. "Mama came to see how you are doing" the woman asked with a smile. He walked and sat down in the empty chair in front of his son.

"Gio's fine, Mama don't worry" Gio replied.

Yep... Last night Gio went to see his mother after learning about Amara's departure. He did not want to do as stupid as before by escaping into the entanglement of intoxicating drinks.

"What did you say to Amara?"

"Gio said he would support whatever he chose,"

The mother smiled faintly, she knew that her favorite child was feeling a great heartbreak. "Someone once said that the highest level of love is when we let the person we love so much to be happy. I think what you're doing is right, Gio. I'm sure you'll get someone who loves you and Evan sincerely, too,"

"Gio tonight so right ?" Suddenly a girl cut off their conversation. He did not realize that Gio was receiving guests.

"My God, I'm sorry" Dea said regretfully as she saw Gio's mother there.

"What's wrong, Dea," said Gio's mother who already knew the girl well. "Please accompany Gio. He's heartbroken,"

"Mama !" Gio Protests.

"What's wrong, you really need a friend and Mama think Dea is the right person to accompany you. You want to, don't you ?"

Dea smiled and nodded slowly. "Of course I want to be Gio's interlocutor" he replied without hesitation.

***

The time has shown at half-nine at night and Gio has not yet revealed his nose at home. The man came home late, not as usual.

Amara wonders where Gio is going not because it is time for the man to take care of Evan. But since Gio left without giving him any news first. And there was something that Amara wanted to tell her husband.

Gio came soon. His face looked very tired with a shirt whose hands had been rolled up to his arms.

The man walked over to Evan and grabbed him. He gave Evan many kisses as a form of his longing.

As for Amara, he immediately approached the tall man enthusiastically. "Gio, Evan said "mama" for the first time" Amara said proudly.

"No waaaayy... No way !!! I've taught him to say the word "Papa" over and over again" Gio said. To the extent that he glared at her eyes.

Amara chuckles amusedly. He is very happy to have beaten Gio. "But it was Mama who Evan first said," said Amara Jumawa.

"Sir, would you like me to warm up for dinner now?" Ask the assistant suddenly.

"No, I've eaten outside" replied Gio.

"Have you eaten ?" Ask Amara.

"Hu 'um... I had dinner with Dea. I owe him a lot, so I took him out to dinner together."

Gio's answer was able to reduce the smile on Amara's face that was happy because of Evan.

"I warm it up for mom, right ? I haven't eaten because I'm waiting for my dad. How's it?" now the housekeeper asked Amara.

"No need, Bi. I'm not hungry anymore" replied Amara, leaving Gio speechless when he heard that.

splice & splice _______________________