Hate You, Love You
The Part I Can't Have

"But... Can you do everything behind my back ? So that I don't have to see and hear it ?" Gio's question made Amara flinch. He really did not expect Gio to say that.

"W-why do I have to do that ?" Asked Amara without turning his body, he could not see Gio.

"Because..," said Gio a little hesitant. Then silence for a while.

"Because my heart hurts when you do it all" Gio replied in the end.

"sickness ?" Ask Amara doesn't understand.

"Hu 'um... My heart feels cramped as well when you come into contact with your fiancee,"

"What do you mean by Gio's pain ?" Amara asked with a laugh, but she felt a sense of unease in her heart.

"I'm not willing, Amara. My heart wants you to be with me" replied Gio sounding soft and poignant.

"Are you crazy, Gio ? Do you think this marriage is real ? You know if I'm gonna leave once your baby's born,"

"Are there not a few loopholes for me to enter your heart, Amara ?"

Silent...

Amara took a deep breath, while letting out tears in her closed eyes. "Tell me, Gio. Are you going to allow someone who has ruined your life to enter your heart ?" Amara asked back.

Gio fell silent, Amara's reply was enough to make him shut up. He smiled wryly when he realized there was not the slightest gap for him to enter his wife's heart. "Hate is that you to me, Amara ?"

"Do I have to answer again ?" Amara asked back.

"No.." replied Gio. "I've understood. You better forget what I said earlier," replied Gio who was trying to remain calm with his voice trembling.

"Good," said Amara. Then he walked away leaving Gio alone without even seeing him once. Because Amara was unable to do so.

***

"Hiks.hiks... Why are you making things so hard for me, Gio ?" Lirih Amara behind her bedroom door. "Why aren't you evil so I can really hate you !! I didn't even dare to look you in the face when I said those hurtful words !" Amara was frustrated.

Amara also felt pain in her heart because what came out of her mouth earlier, very contrary to what she actually felt.

"I can't be with you, Gio !! there's someone I've been lying to for too long. And I'll feel more guilty to her if I choose you" Amara put her body on the floor.

While on Gio, Amara also began to feel comfortable if he was nearby. Gio's gentle demeanor always made Amara want to be around him. Even Amara felt displeased as Dea approached Gio. There was a sense of jealousy coming.

"Your own fault, Ara ! You should stick to your plan to always keep your distance and hate Gio !" Amara blames herself for allowing herself to be close to her husband.

"I should hate you, Gio ! I should have hated you...,"

***

Gio stood alone in his room which he left dark. His eyes stared blankly out the window that was not covered by the curtain. At this time his feelings were so broken because of Amara's words earlier.

Gio is heartbroken.

"You will be the saddest part of my life,. Amara. You are a part of me that will never be mine" Gio said. Her head was filled with memories of Amara being so sweet lately.

"You will also be the happiest part of my life and the saddest. And I'll be the loneliest man without your love" continued Gio still with his soft voice. Thinking that he would never fall in love with any woman other than Amara.

Gio laughed softly, laughing at himself who turned out to love Amara so deeply. Gio just wanted to take responsibility for the mistakes he made. But in fact Gio's guilt turns into a love for Amara.

"If only you knew, Amara... I thought about you before we met. And when I first saw you, I immediately felt a tremor in my heart. As time went on, I fell in love with you" Gio said, thinking about the series of events between him and Amara.

"Aahhhhhh, why is it like this?" Gio said regretfully. She should have known that Amara would never love her.

"You are the part of my life that I could never have, Amara. Aarrrgghh..," Gio groaned, enduring the agonizing pain. He raised his fist so that clear water would not come down from his eyes. He really felt pain in his heart.

Late at night, Gio laid his body on the bed. His eyes were closed but his consciousness remained there. He could even listen to the sound of the clock's seconds constantly changing.

Gio desperately tries to remove Amara's shadow from his head. But her pretty face and my eyes always haunt me. Even Gio could not feel hate because of the rejection Amara gave him.

'tok tok' Gio's eyes opened as he heard a knock on the door.

"Gio's... Gio my stomach hurts so much..," A soft word from behind the door made Gio spontaneously rise.

"Fromance !!!" Said Gio in a panic and immediately ran towards the door to open it.

To be continued

Don't forget to leave a trail