Although Not Perfect
Befriend the husband

"Wait.stay here. I'm still trying to remember what portion of your meal is this big?"he said while looking at me who was still busy chewing my food.

Our eyes meet, I see his sad gaze but contains a thousand questions that have not been able to enter his logic.

...----------------...

I turned my gaze towards my plate, without realizing that my portion of food seemed to be twice as much as usual.

Maybe because I had to share it with the two children who were in my womb. I better ask the doctor during the next visit, is it normal like this..?

"Emm... lately I've always been hungry, are you ashamed of having a fat wife? Wouldn't it be that I'm thin people would say I suffer from marrying you." I said as I took my eyes off her.

Anyun chuckles.

"Eat a lot, actually I do not want if there is food wasted.." he said later.

"So meningan mas Reza if in the cooking house is enough for your portion alone let not mubadzir.or whether it is used to cooking for mbak Vina ya..."I said while trying to play my role as a friend to him.

Hearing the name of his late wife, his smile began to be engraved.

" Hmm..I used to rarely cook, because Vina who always did, it's just that when her body condition decreased, I was getting used to cooking for both of us..."

The story was a romantic one, but unfortunately it ended in pain.

" Mr Vina is indeed a dream wife so it is appropriate to get a husband like Mas Reza.." said me with a mindful tone.

"Have you been reluctant to eat with me all this time?" he said without seeing me.

"I'm just not sure if you can eat with me or not? I just don't want Reza to be an ilfeel eating a table with me, let alone a shadow mbak Vina, mending me eat alone..."

The sharp look on his face seemed to justify my words. We continued our lunch in silence.

"I'm sorry I can't be a good husband to you." he said after Reza finished his lunch.

I just smiled in response to that.

“There is no need to apologize, because I myself cannot be a good wife for you. We are not only friends in this marriage.." I said with a tired tone.

"Is there a time limit in our agreement? Either way you deserve a husband who loves you and makes you happy in a real marriage..."

That sentence gave me goosebumps, what should I say to this man who is suddenly foreign to me. Wherever the sentence goes that I will be the last woman for her and even though we do not know each other very well will guarantee my happiness.

" I just enjoy what I'm going through, because this is divine destiny, when there comes a time when we part, I will also try to be sincere as long as we can talk about it well with our extended family..."

" Okay, Amel, thank you for being willing to give happiness to my family.Do not worry, when we part I will guarantee all your needs..."

It's all about the material. The pain suddenly flowed in my heart..

There was nothing I could do but smile and nod at him. I think this conversation is like a working partner, not a normal married couple.

That lunch was a step towards making Reza more open and trusting of me.

I rubbed my stomach and asked my children to fight for their father's love.

It was raining so hard that afternoon, it made me leave my bike at the cafe and go home with Reza. Our car walked slowly through the rain-soaked streets with strong winds.

There was no conversation between us, I myself was busy with my thoughts on how to restore those memories.

My spirit never receded to try to collect memory fragments about me in his mind.

Ddrrtttt.the sound of ringing and vibrating his phone broke our silence.

"Hello.iya, I'm still on my way there.."after that mas Reza closed the phone.

I felt like I was watching him look at me. At that time the car stopped because the traffic light turned red.

"After dropping you off, I'll meet Vani." he said, looking back at me.

"Vani?" my forehead is wrinkled to hear it.

"Yes.the grandfather of Vina, did I never talk about it?"

"What's wrong with him?

"He needs my help to take care of the recovery of shares in his uncle's company." said Reza who returned to focusing on the streets.

"Have you ever seen him before..."

"Yes.I once promised Vina, even though she's gone, I will always maintain good relations with her family..."

My chest is back to hearing it. Tasya once told me about the Vina family who had settled in London since his departure.

A few months ago his sister again settled in Indonesia, and it seems like after three dollars, he began to approach Reza mas.

"Did she know you were married?"ask again.

"Yes, I told him.."

"Did Reza know that he likes you too?"

"Hm...He's said it before..."

"Then?" the curiosity was so great, it turned out that I missed something...

"I don't know, I know I never intended to be in a relationship with another woman but I'm also confused that I got married to you..."

I rested my head on the chair, setting my heart because it seemed like she was sorry to marry me. Wanting to hit his head that suddenly stupid, emang who used to melt my mother's heart to be willing to take me off.

The drizzle was still faithfully soaking the earth when we reached the depths of our home.

"If you hadn't married me, would you have married her?" my resentment towards her began to peak when I said it, then I got out of the car without waiting for the answer.

After I got inside the house, I heard the roar of the car leaving the yard.

I immediately entered the main room, I stepped my feet staring around the room that I had not touched for a long time.

The bed reminded me of my nights with her, I took a breath and I gently stroked my stomach.

"What's wrong, my dear, we will still together to try to win your father's heart."

I turned around to get out of the room, but my steps stopped in the photo mbak Vina who is still on display there.

"Sorry mother Vina, I won't let your sister take Reza's mas because I will make her fall in love with me just as much as her love for you I won't stop until death picks me up..."

Then I got out of the room and closed it again. I take my feet to the next room, where I sleep every night. After cleaning the room, I took a shower to refresh my body and mind.

The wall clock shows at fifty-thirty in the evening as I descended from the stairs towards the kitchen.

It's time to act, practice what chef Richard taught me. I will cook dinner, because the time is tight, I choose a simple menu that I will serve.

After the magrib prayer, I started cooking rice at magiccom and then I was serving beef ribs and vegetables.

Finally after an hour of struggling in the kitchen I serve Kimlo beef rib soup, ca broccoli, dori krispi sambal matah, tempe chips and peeled apples at the dinner table.

I cleaned the kitchen when I heard the sound of a car parking in the yard. I immediately welcomed him.

When I opened the door, it wasn't Reza...