My soul mate
CHAPTER 20

POV Khansa Almira

Life has brought me deeper. Until I almost drowned. Although sometimes I don't understand what the purpose of all this is. I know all the events that happened to me there must be a silver lining. But I don't know, why my heart still revolts, why should I go through. Why not someone else. I have tried to be a good woman. Let me be the woman of choice who is considered capable with this exam. My chest feels so tight.

Clear circles continued to flow on both of my cheeks without me being able to hold back. I want to scream with this destiny. But should anyone who declares that Allah is my Robb, and the prophet Muhammad is my rosul despair of His mercy. While the love verses I always read.

I am Khansa Almira, always trying to be a devout Muslim, to be a good wife. Trying to order the ma'ruf and prevent the mungkar but still divorced the husband because of the love of the husband to the woman who had been his lover. I have been married for 2 months without being blessed. I am a widow but still a virgin. Ah, it's pathetic.

"Khansa, don't drag on in grief, son. Life is long. You are still young. God willing, God will give you the best soul mate" said Mother as she stroked my hair.

"What do you think Arkan is not a good man for Khansa? Arkan is never light-handed, Arkan is also good with his family. He is also generous. But why would she prefer Maria, ma'am?" I can't understand what makes Arkan really blind love like Mary. Maria is beautiful, sexy and educated. Yet many women like Mary tried to enter the Arkan life before being betrothed to me.

"That's the test, son. If Allah wills his heart to be closed, no one can open it. Is it the same as the blind who see? certainly not? That's the image of a blind Arkan, my mother replied.

"Trust me, a good woman is a good man, and vice versa. While the adulteress woman is the adulteress male soul mate too, and vice versa," continued the mother.

"But Arkan is not an adulterer buk" I protested.

"Just pray that Arkan will be guided. Now don't be sad anymore. More passion for activity. Your students wait for your smile. Not your cry."

*****

This morning I went to school with more enthusiasm. An online motorcycle taxi has led me to the front of the gate.

"Ustadzah Khansa, tumben ride ojek online. Usually delivered by her husband," said Ustadzah Ika guardian of class 4. I just smiled bitterly. Ustadzah Ika did not know that I was divorced from my husband.

"More busy ustadzah," I replied.

"Oh, oya ustadzah Khansa still ngajar private Nayla?" ask her again as we walk into the teacher's room.

"Alhamdulillah is still," I answered.

"I heard that Nayla has experienced rapid development since she was held by Khansa's ustadzah. The rote of juz 30 sped up quickly. The umminya reading has also been volume 5," he continued.

"Alhamdulillah ustadzah Ika. Now his son is very excited" I said again.

*****

Nayla's school came to me in the teacher's room. He wants to take me home together and learn some private lessons. Today it came home rather quickly because some of the teachers attended the children's education seminar. I did not attend the seminar. Teachers who attend the seminar are teachers who are appointed by the principal to follow it.

"Ustadzah Khansa, papa today said he could not pick up. We'll take an online taxi" take Nayla to me.

"May, the first boarding diploma is yes," I said while opening an online taxi application.

"Ok, ready." I immediately ordered an online taxi to the city park. 5 minutes later, our online taxi order was waiting at the school gate. Soon Naila and I approached an online taxi.

"The city park, sir," I said as I got into a taxi with Nayla.

"Well neng" said the brother of the online taxi.

The online taxi drove at a speed splitting the traffic jam of Jakarta to the city park that we intended. 25 minutes later we had arrived at the park. Before studying, we went to the cafe first to fill the stomach that has been rumbling. We finished our meal and headed to the park.

The green plants seemed to be swaying in the wind. It was so cool and fresh in the heat of the city. My hijab dances too. Sometimes I hold it so that it does not open and look my hair.

Nayla and I sat on the green grass. I see Nayla is so excited. Her face without her was so cheerful.

"Is there a Naila PR?" my many.

"There is no ustadzah" he replied.

"Then we murajaah letter Al Balad yes," I said. Alhamdulillah Naila has arrived at the letter of Assy Sham. Now continue Al Balad's letter.

"Neither the ustadzah, but Nayla only memorized until verse 10" he said.

"No matter what Nay, later ustadzah talaqqi next verse," I said. In his ummhina Nayla began to read Verses 1-10. MaasyaAllah, the reading has begun to tartil. After reading Al Balad's letter, Nayla began to review Ummi's book volume 5. When we again focused on murajaah ummi volume 5 suddenly papa Nayla came to Nayla's surprise.

"Papa, I know we're here again" asked Nayla happily

"So papa was not a meeting, papa saw in the group WA guardian students that today Nayla came home quickly. So papa went straight to Nayla's school. As papa arrived, papa see Nay same ustadzah Khansa has entered a taxi. So papa followed her secretly."

"Oh, so papa saw Nay same ustadzah Khansa eat at the cafe too?" ask Nayla curiously.

"Dear, baby" said papa Nayla.

"Well, why don't you join?" ask Nayla again.

"If papa joins, it means no surprise dong," said papa Naila sambik smiling. I just lowered my head while listening to the conversation between the father and the child.

"Ustadzah Khansa, this is for ustadzah" said papa Nayla while giving a rose. I hesitated to accept it. What does this gift mean? While when I married a Arkan mas, a Arkan mas never gave me flowers like this.

"Accept ustadzah, that papa wants to be a close friend of ustadzah. Papa already knows that the ustadzah has separated from the husband of ustadzah," pinta Khansa told me. I never told Nayla about my life, let alone her papa. How did he know that I had parted ways with Arkan's mas? I'm still silent.

"Come on the ustadzah" pinta Nayla while pulling my hand. I finally received the flower for forcing Nayla.