AGAPE (SELFLESS LOVE)
Although Cannot Touch It, At Least ... I Can See It

Buana's VOP

I cried in my silence, though my tears did not unravel, but ... in my chest.

I hugged empty, I was beset with sin, my mind was torn apart.

All hope of fixing it all ran aground. Though, tomorrow I should go to Far Island to ask for the blessing of his father and mother. I hugged my knees while holding a gun. It felt like I wanted to blow my head off this very second, but .. I remember You.

It is true that most people who commit suicide are because of love, family and the economy. If that happens to me, my motive is love.

Many people do this because they think suicide is the best way to release all the burdens of life that is being wracked.

But in my religion, suicide is a forbidden act that is hated by Him. The threat of his sin is not responsible and is so detrimental to the perpetrator. Suicide-takers will stay in hell forever.

So ... suicide for any reason is haram, period. I realized that. I finally put my gun back in the bag.

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"Linda .... why is our love fate like this? It's too painful."

For me, Linda Berliana was my first love, before I had not expressed love to anyone.

Yes, during school and college I was once close to some women, but .. I only consider them as friends.

Some girls have misinterpreted my kindness. They think I like it just because I'm good, when.

I've been beaten up to go to the hospital by a group of men for being accused of being a play boy who often toyed with women's feelings.

From then on I never approached women again, and was always cold when I met them. I'm afraid my kindness is misunderstood again.

Why have I never expressed love? The reason I was .. I wanted to find a girl who was indifferent to me or ordinary when I met her. But ... I didn't find it.

All the women who saw me immediately smiled kindly, but only met for the first time. After that, they will get attention by approaching me, asking for a mobile number, giving me gifts, even some who come to my house with their parents.

Why yes?

I don't understand why they are like that. After I worked in the HGC and the slander spread to the public, strangely the women stayed close and often teased me.

I guess they won't like me after the news that says I'm a same-sex person is spread to the public. In the end I found out if they were trying to get close to me for money reasons.

Until one day I actually found a woman who looked at me dislike. The woman is not hypocritical by pretending to be nice, not looking for attention, not flirtatious, and not pretentious. Linda Berliana's.

When he first met, he showed me his hatred. I didn't think she was the woman who would take everything from me, my heart, and my chastity. She was the only woman who could make me shed tears besides my mother.

"Linda Beliana ...."

I peeked behind the curtains of the car, I saw the rain had subsided, the fog had disappeared, the lightning had gone, and the heavy wind had passed. This toll road is still running, but there are already one or two vehicles that pass at high speed.

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The clock on my hand was showing at 03:14 in the morning. I hugged my leg again while playing his cellphone which was still inactive.

Do you want to know what happened to me and Linda before?

Should I tell you?

Then who do you guys I mean?

Besides my Lord, who else do I tell this pain to?

Or ... I precipitate and forget about the incident at the bottom of my heart without saying it to anyone.

But .. I can't, I can't forget how she kissed my lips crying, and kissed my whole face with tears.

"I will surely miss these eyes, nose, cheeks, eyebrows, ears and lips."

That's what he said when he kissed my face. I kept quiet, I couldn't say anything, because what he was going to talk about was separation.

Then she stroked my hair, while I kept staring at her and hugged her tubing tightly. Her face flushed red from crying, her eyes were puffy, and she.

"What should I do, so you don't cry anymore, Linda?"

I asked as I stroked his smooth, silky back skin. Back then, he let me touch his stomach and back.

"Sir Agam, if Mr. Agam loves me, please let me go, I want to live in my own way, without burdening anyone, without disturbing Mr. Agam, especially to disturb the stability of HGC stocks." While continuing to caress my hair.

"Linda, why would you say something like that? I don't feel burdened. Tell me, who's the one who hurt your feelings? HGC has nothing to do with you. Am I not worthy to love you? Am I too ugly? Is it not worth it if I want to be the father of the baby you bear? After all, he is my son. Can't you forgive me for your uncle's death?"

"Ssthtt ...."

He put his index finger on my lips, then kissed me again.

Actually he just dipped, but .. My response was excessive. I immediately explored her lips as I pleased to the deepest points I could reach. Until she was out of breath, until she whimpered, and grabbed my hair. I could only stop after he bit me.

"Sorry ...." I said.

But she was not angry, instead crying again in my chest.

"The person who has hurt me is myself, Mr. Agam deserves to be loved, Father is not contemptible. Father is my son's father, it's destiny. I have forgiven all the things that Mr. Agam has done to me."

"What's the problem with Linda? Why do you want us to separate? Why, hahhh?" I move his shoulders.

"That's because .. I always feel guilty when I want to continue being with Mr. Agam, I feel guilty to my mother, my father, my uncle and also to myself. Mr. Agam .., please give me a chance to organize my own heart and my own way of life."

"I will reflect on my mistakes in my own way. Mr. Agam .. I'm tired of living like this, hiding from people, hiding my pregnancy, being shunned by my family, and pretending to be happy in front of my fans."

"Linda, therefore .. let's live with me .. I will make you happy."

I kissed every drop of his tears that fell. I even kissed back her neck lovingly, I wanted to prove that I loved her very much. I also felt the part of her body that I missed, at first she did not refuse, but.

"I can make you happy, Linda ...."

Again I tried to convince her, I woke up, I locked her body, then I opened her upper dress slowly.

"Sir Agam ..please don't be like this." He held my hand.

"Linda I want to kiss my future son." Refute with a little firmness.

He finally resigned as I peed at his stomach. It felt so comfortable, fragrant, soft and .. and I almost lost control. But Linda immediately realized me by slapping me strongly.

"Sorry ...." I hugged him back.

"I can make you happy, Linda ...." The sentence was spoken again.

"How can I be happy when I look at you, my heart hurts."

"What?!" I'm appalled.

"When I saw Father, I suddenly remembered how my father and mother hated me, how the artist Ririn, the doctor Cepy, Fanny's mother insulted me, how Mr. Yohan threatened me, and I remember the gazes of everyone who underestimated me."

I woke up, as hurt as she felt?

"And I also remember my uncle. I'm sorry Mr. Agam .. I promise I won't tell the police anything. With my existence, Mr. Agam also felt unsettled, right? My existence on the side of Mr. Agam often makes Mr. Agam not concentrated in work. While the existence of Mr. Agam for the company is very important."

"Trust me, sir. I promise I can take care of myself and our baby. I will take care of him with my life. Mr. Agam work right, fight for what you want to fight for the welfare of the people."

"You have so much heart Linda, are you going to marry another man, huhh?"

I'm angry, I'm upset, I bite back at his neck. But he did not scream at all let alone get angry. He just bit his lips.

"No, I won't marry anyone."

"Except with me?" my insistence.

But he didn't answer. I even cried again in my chest.

"Are you going abroad? What if I miss you so much, Linda? Please don't leave me abroad. If you want to take your own life, at least .. Please give me a chance to see you, even if I can't touch you."

I wailed, I groaned, I looked at her, I kissed her hand again. I ... I beg for his love and mercy.

"Right Agam .... Instead of a golden rain in the land of people, it is better to hail stones in the land itself. To me, however happy it is to live in a country of people, it is still preferable to live in one's own country."

"That proverb I can accept after I know how Mr. Agam fought desperately to keep the HGC from foreign interference. Same with Mr. Agam, although it may be difficult, I will also fight in my own country."

I was overwhelmed to hear his words.

"Linda .. let me support you, however you may be carrying my child."

At that time I immediately grabbed the bag to give him an unlimited card. But what did he say?

"Sir Agam, for a while, I felt I did not need the money, I sincerely loved Mr. Agam. I sincerely take care of the fruit of our love, even without the help of the Father, I feel capable. Besides the HGC has contracted me a billion a year, that's enough money, sir."

"And I can also be contracted because of Mr. Agam. Let's just say Mr. Agam has given me a living through the ad."

I could not speak anymore, could only hug her and say something crazy spontaneously.

"Well, if that's what you want, go. May you be happy. But .... Before we part, can we do it? I miss him, give me that pleasure again. Linda .. kumohoo." My whisper.

Yes, at that time I was crazy, I was a man who lost his mind and lacked faith.

"W-what? What enjoyment?"

He was very surprised.

"Your body is Linda .., and I will also give you the same. I will give you pleasure. Want it ...?"

I'm out of bounds. Satan and lust have possessed and possessed my body.

"W-what? So ... is that to the extent that Mr Agam loves me? Limited lust? Okay, let's do as you please, but after this ... Mr. Agam don't expect to see me again, let's forget each other, assume that we never know each other."

She pushed my chest, then hugged her knees and cried again. His crying was louder than before.

I nodded, I squeezed my head. I am so sorry and feel guilty.

"Linda, forgive me .. I'm sorry. I won't ask for it again until we're legally in the marriage bind."

I pulled his body, I put his head in my arm.

"I just want to sleep holding you and holding your stomach, is that okay?"

Linda did not answer, but her head nodded. He hugged me tight too. And a few moments later, she fell asleep in my arms. You may be tired from crying constantly.

I stared at her for a long time, I traced her face, and stroked her hair as she fell asleep. The sleepiness came, and I fell asleep while holding it.

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And when I opened my eyes again, Linda was gone, which I hugged not Linda, but my shirt. I screamed out his name and looked for him under the chair, a place that was impossible to hide.

He left my cell phone. He left a longing and incised a wound in my heart.

Now .... in this car .. I'm alone, without him.

Then I turned on my phone to try to reach her through Yohan's number. But suddenly an article flashed across my porch. Titled ....

"Latest Facts About New Artist, LB. Numbers 1 To 3 Are Ordinary, Number 4 and Number 5 Are Surprising, Number 6 Makes Us Head Nod."

I took a deep breath. I promised to protect her in any way she didn't know.

Even if I can't touch it, at least.

❤❤ Connect ....