Carmen's Love Trap
Great Quarrel-2

Carmen

Mas Zaky looks so emotional at the moment. Her face flushed. I can't avoid the mouth anymore.

"Are you trying? I'm trying too! I tried to forget the Goddess, but I couldn't, and all you did was make me even more unable to forget the Goddess. I also try to be a good husband. You think what I've been doing all this time is pointless? I sacrificed! I'm a victim of feelings here!"

"Mas I don't sacrifice? I sacrificed too, Mom! I live with a man who never loved me. I hope, everything I do that can little by little make Mas see me. Makes you love me. But what? Everything I do is meaningless in my eyes. Mas still chasing after Kak Dewi like crazy. Mas knew that Kak Dewi was happy with Abang Wira, but Mas instead offered himself to have an affair, if not crazy what is his name?"

Mas Zaky also raised the intonation of his voice. "I'm crazy, but your desire for divorce is crazier! What did both of our parents say? You just make them more hostile. Do you know what their problems were in the past? Why do you even want to make the war between our two parents repeat itself? You're happy to see them fighting again like they used to? Your egoism!"

I smiled cynically, very clever Mas Zaky cornered me and made me the villain. "Oh that?! I'm selfish? I'm selfish you say? You are selfish, Mom! Have you seen my sacrifice in a year? Marriage to you is a sacrifice, Mom. I sacrificed my youth to marry a man who never saw me at all. Do you think I have no dreams? Do you think I have no desire to be happy? Do you think you have no desire to love other men out there? I have, but I'm a sniff,"

"I forgot all my dreams. I forgot all my wishes. All because of who? Because Mas! I want to build a loving home. I planted the seeds of love little by little in Mas's life. I decorate our home and our household with love. I hope that the love I instilled will grow and blossom beautifully,"

I wiped away the tears that felt so sore from my face when I said this. "But I realized I was just planting on dry, barren sandy soil. Not a single seedling that I planted grew, but it became dead like our household which from the beginning was a mistake" I wiped the tears that kept coming out of my eyes.

"I was wrong to propose to you, Mom. I was wrong to force this marriage with you. I was wrong to force a man who loves another woman to love me, I am stupid, very stupid, and I have received a recompense for my stupidity. A year of marriage doesn't make me happy at all,"

"Now I want to be happy, Mom. I'm gonna go. Don't block my steps anymore. I will not hinder your steps either. Keep loving Goddess like crazy. Keep hoping with Sister Goddess, I won't care anymore. Do what you think is good. Do what you think will make you happy. But one thing, I will no longer be behind Mas. We each walk from now on. With the life you want. I will also start the life I want. I'm going to sue Mas for a divorce on the grounds of incompatibility between us. See you in court, Mom. Assalamualaikum!"

I pulled my suitcase and walked out of the house. Mas Zaky's after me. His face looks panicked. "No, Baby! Don't leave! We can talk about all this well. What you want, will love. What do you want? I will give it! I'm sorry okay? Don't you do this the same!"

I put my suitcase in the trunk of the car and closed it. I looked at Mas Zaky who was blocking my departure. "I always hoped Mas would ask me this question. What do I want? I'll say out loud, I want to love. But now, I don't want that anymore. I'm already tired. I'm already at my tired point. I've tried enough this year. You are free now. I can drop my talaq on me. I'm ready to hear it."

I wipe away the tears that fell. Although it is very painful, this thorn must be removed. I don't want my whole self to be hurt by one thorn that has struck me and hurt my heart.

"No, By! I will not divorce you!" Mas Zaky held my hand, his eyes reddened with tears. Either angry tears or.. sad? Can't be!

"Then, say the talisman in court only!" I took his hand and got into the car.

Mas Zaky knocked on the car door and asked me to give him a chance. I don't mind anymore. I got my car out of the garage and left the house I no longer live in.

I put my car in one of the cafes and then took a taxi to the airport. There's only one place I'm going. Jogjakarta. Where peace in life is created.

🎶When you try your best, but you don't succeed

When you get what you want, but not what you need

When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

Could it be worth?

Lights will guide you home

Ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you🎶

(Coldplay - Fix You)

****

Zaky

I quickly chased after Carmen but I was stuck in traffic. I passed Abi's house but there was no car. I went to the shop but nothing.

Where did Baby go?

I went to the shophouse where Dewi and Wira lived, the result was nil. I saw their laughing family playing with their first child. I don't care anymore. Baby is more important now.

Baby knows how I feel about the Goddess and he's been harboring her all this time? Why didn't I realize it? Apparently that night he heard my conversation and the Goddess. His carefree attitude had apparently covered all the sadness he felt.

It is only fitting that he becomes more moody. No more fun to welcome my arrival. He just doesn't tease me anymore. You idiot! Why do I know it now?!

Even when I spoke yesterday with the Goddess did Baby hear it? Oh Allah... I must have hurt her heart so much!

Where else should I find the boy? All day I was looking for her whereabouts and finally I found Baby's car parked in one of Mommy Tari's cafes.

I got out of my car and went into the cafe. I went to the cashier and asked where Baby was at the cashier.

"Sorry sir, Carmen's mother left earlier with a suitcase. Take a taxi. Mom said pull the car. I didn't say anything else, sir." replied the cashier.

Take taxis? Whither?

Instantly I realized I didn't know anything about Baby. Who's his best friend, where he's going. I have little information when she is my wife. Only then did I realize how much I didn't care about Baby.

I am confused as to where to look. To ask both of his parents is impossible. I'm just speeding up the explosion of a big bomb that's going to re-ignite the quarrel that happened when they were young. Didn't ask, I confused myself to find my wife where.

Asking the Goddess is impossible. The goddess is still very angry with me. If you are the same hero, it is better not to. I still remember the tonjoknya on my face. The pain did not go away in a short time.

Baby... You where?

****