Being late in love
Pain but not bleeding
Let's go back to Hana......
"I'm sorry, but Hana can't go back to Surya."
I said it in a very subtle tone, I didn't want to hurt her feelings.
"Loh, why? Don't you love the same?" He was shocked by my words just now..
"Yes, Hana is love and love the same Mas, but there are more need mas than Hana,"
"You mean?" Ask in a tone that you don't like.
"Iren needs Mas more than Hana, she needs the support of her husband, Hana does not want to hurt other women, Hana does not want to be a grabber of people's husbands, just Hannah aja whose husband was captured, Hana does not want to be a selfish person Mas, Hana also does not want to get married but does not have love, Hana also does not want if Hana eventually experiences what Mas experienced, as well, falling in love too late, when it's too late, there's nothing we can do.
So sorry Hana can't go back the same way Mas." I said long and wide.
"But what about the feelings of the Mas who have started to love you?"
"Enough Allah be your protector, leave your love to Him alone. Like Hannah who always pursues His love, God will send those who love us as we are."
"Are you sure you don't want to go back the same?"
I smiled at the question.
"Why do we come back if we only hurt those who love us sincerely?"
"What do you mean? Do you have a lover?"
"No. Hana doesn't have a boyfriend, but that guy liked Hana long before we got married, even with her gentle she nagged Hana. So Hana wants to give her a chance to open her heart to him, Mas,"
"Use your second chance to improve your relationship mas, relationship with Mama Papa, Hana sincerely with Hana's love for Mas,"
"What a noble heart, dear.. I'm sorry I divorced you..." Mas surya started shedding tears.
"Mas, stop. Use the time and opportunity that God still gives you Mas, hopefully there is a miracle so that Iren can get pregnant again, Hana wishes the best for you."
I pat her on the shoulder, the shoulder I've never touched. The shoulder that has been ignoring my tears, if you remember it hurts so much, but I am not a vengeful person.
"I'm sorry Hana.sorry Mas..."
"Yes, Hana was sorry, long before Mas apologized to Hana."
"Then I say goodbye, sorry and thank you Hana.."
"Yes, um,,"
hufft...
What does it feel like? I'm having a hard time explaining it, it hurts but it doesn't bleed, it hurts but it doesn't hurt. I can only take a long breath.
After the departure of Mas Surya from my office, I was still cool with my daydreams. I promised myself I'd forget my love for Mas Surya, and I'd start a new love, a love that God has longed for.
It's not fair if I'm in a relationship but my heart still belongs to someone else, so as much as possible I'll open my heart and accept Mas Rizal's love. That's my promise in my heart.
I walked out of the room looking into the backyard, but Mas Rizal wasn't there. Tumben he didn't come think I, Ah. Maybe he's done a lot of work again yeah, so I let him go without contacting him.
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